Nolte: The 2018 Breitbart News Fake News Awards

WASHINGTON, DC - NOVEMBER 07: White House television correspondents report after U.S. Pres
Mark Wilson/Getty Images; Edit: BNN

Writing this was easy. Compiling it was a muthah.

Until you actually take the time to research the amount of lies and lies and lies the establishment media deliberately spread, you can’t begin to fathom just how bad things are. By the time I was done going through the entire year, I literally, no joke, had 11 pages of headlines to choose from for these awards.

Remember the good old days when “bias” was the media’s biggest problem?

Well, as you will see below, today’s media are full-blown gangsters — liars, extortionists, and champions of violence.

Here’s 2017’s list of winners.

Onward to 2018…

Hot Taker Whose Idiotic Hot Takes Hot Taked Him Into a Jackass the Left and Right Laugh at in Unison

Tie…

CNN’s Chris Cillizza

CNN’s Chris Cillizza

Runner up: CNN’s Chris Cillizza

 

This Year’s Chief Stenographer for Democrats Desperate to Spread Fake News Smears

NBC’s Kasie Hunt

 

Most Misleading Use of the Word ‘Credible’

Fox News

 

Supplying the Most Proof the Media Should Not Be Reporting on Guns

USA Today’s Chainsaw Bayonet

Runner up: CNN

 

2018’s Biggest Credibility Collapse After Suffering 2017’s and 2016’s Biggest Credibility Collapse

CNN’s Jake “The Most Mistrusted Journalist In America” Tapper

 

Easter’s Biggest Asshole

CNN’s Jim Acosta

 

Such a Big Liar Special Counsel Robert Mueller Felt the Need to Say Something

A gazillion-way tie:

McClatchy

The Daily Beast

The Guardian

Vox

Washington Post

Reuters

The Hill

 

Disgraced Watergate Reporter Who Forgot the Cover Up’s Worse than the Crime

Carl Bernstein

 

Democrat Party’s Most Vital Ally For the 2018 Mid-Terms

Fox News

 

The Dan Rather Award for Just Making Shit Up

The New York Times

 

The Worst Prediction Predicted By a Fake News Outlet that Knew It Was a Lie When Predicting It

CNN

 

Award for “Manufactured Outrage Over a Policy You Didn’t Care About When Obama Did It”

While listing the fake news outlets guilty of this I ran out of Internet.

 

Most Satisfying Self-Own of 2018

Time Magazine

 

Most Satisfying Self-Own Committed By a Guy Who Reminds You of a Supporting Godfather Character 

Chris  Cuomo

 

The Relentless Piece of Fake News That Is So Relentless and Fake It Is Now White Noise

Trump’s going to fire Robert Mueller

 

Worst Math Score By a Fake Indian’s Media Fluffer

The Boston Globe

 

Most Eager to Jump All Over Trump’s Penis

CNN’s Jake Tapper

 

Most Eager for a Second Helping of Trump’s Penis

CNN’s Jake Tapper

 

The Tree that Fell In the Neocon Forest

The Weekly Standard

 

Greatest Impersonation of Joe McCarthy

Tie:

CNN’s Chris “The Fredo” Cuomo

CNN’s Brian “The Tater” Stelter

BuzzFeed’s Charlie Warzel

 

Most Dishonest Legal Analyst Not Named Jeffrey Toobin

Fox News’ Andrew Napolitano

 

Worst Homophobe Working at NBC News

Tie:

Joe Scarborough’s latest wife

Joy Reid

 

“Be Careful What You Wish For” Award

The New York Times would like to thank Donald Trump for this award…

 

“Columnist so Shrill Only Dogs Can Hear Her” Award

Washington Post’s Jennifer Rubin

 

“Columnist so Dumb Forrest Gump Points and Laughs” Award

Washington Post’s Jennifer Rubin

 

Column Should Be Named “Mean-Girling without Principles” Award

Washington Post’s Jennifer Rubin

 

“The Potbelly Calling the Kettle Black” Award

CNN’s Ana Navarro

 

The “I Say These Things Cuz I Have Nowhere Else To Go If CNN Fires Me” Award

Tie…

CNN’s SE Cupp

CNN’s SE Cupp

 

Biggest Piece of Fake News Spread By a Tax Dollar-Sucking Welfare Queen

NPR

 

Award for Proving Orwell Correct

New York Times

 

“Educated But Still Breathtakingly Stupid” Award

Tie…

BuzzFeed

Daily Beast’s Sam Stein

 

Most Amount of Effort Put Into a ‘Bombshell’ No One Cares About

L.O.L.

 

“Warmest Embrace of Domestic Terrorism” Award

Tie:

CNN’s Chris Cuomo

CNN’s Don Lemon

 

“Had No Place to Go But Up and Still Went Down” Award

CNN’s ratings

 

Dumbest Attempt to Get Crooked Hillary Off the Hook

Y’all are weak.

 

“Biggest Surrender to the Reality that Everyone Hates You” Award

White House Correspondents’ Association 

 

Dumbest Person on TV Not Named Wolf Blitzer or Jim Acosta

CNN’s April Ryan

 

The Winner of 2018’s “Bye, Felicia” Award

Free Agent Megyn Kelly

 

“Worst Prediction Made By a Half-Witted Peacock Who Dyes His Hair too Dark” Award

CNN’s Jim Acosta

 

“Predictions That Would Get You Fired If the Media Weren’t a Cult” Award

Tie:

Axios’ Mike Allen

NBC’s Chuck Todd

Tater

 

“Hate Makes You Dumb” Award

AP

 

Award for Failing to Understand Atticus Finch is the Good Guy in ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’

NBC’s Kate Snow

 

Dumbest-ass Historian Award

NBC’s Jon “The Newsweek Killer” Meacham

 

The Glenn Thrush Award for Super-Duper Creepy He-Man Woman-Haters Club

Tie…

NBC’s Nicolle Wallace

CNN’s Jim Acosta

Washington Post’s Aaron Blake

NeverTrump’s Cheri Jacobus

ABC’s Terry Moran

Washington Post’s Jennifer Rubin

CNN’s Drew Griffin

CNN’s Jake Tapper

…and most especially Politico

 

The “Rape Is Merely Harassment When Bill Clinton’s Accused of It” Award

CNN’s Christiane Amanpour

 

Worst Performance During a Hurricane

The Weather Channel’s Mike Seidel

 

The Hillary Clinton Award for Paranoid Liar Who Gets Away With It Cuz Our Media Is Garbage

NBC’s Joy Reid

 

Catfight of the Year

Meowwww….

 

Deep State Fluffer of the  Year

The Weekly Standard

 

“Most Hysterical Comment Made By a Terrible Musician” Award 

Trump ‘Opens the Door’ for Genocide By Calling Omarosa ‘Dog’

 

This Year’s “Alex Jones Is Still Here and You’re Not” Award

The Weekly Standard

 

Award for Hiring an Unrepentant Racist

Tie…

New York Times

CNN

 

Most Sincere Call for Fascism

The Daily Mail’s David Martosko

 

Second Most Sincere Call for Fascism

New York Times’ Maggie Haberman

 

The “Holy Shit You REALLY Love Fascism” Award

CNN’s Phillip Mudd

 

“Most Willing to Forgive Concentration Camps If Mike Pence Is Getting Owned” Award

Tie…

Every Establishment Media Outlet in America

 

“Most Pathetic Attack On a Supreme Court Nominee Ever” Award

New York Times

 

Retraction of the Year Not Performed By CNN 

… or CNN

Tie…

NBC News

Washington Post

ABC News

The Washington Post again…

 

The Jennifer Rubin Award for Shrillest Piece of Fake News Spread In the Shrillest Way Possible

Jennifer Rubin

 

Lying Liars Who Lie Just to Hear Themselves Lie Award

NBC’s Andrea Mitchell

CNN’s Jim Sciutto

NBC’s Katy Tur

NBC’s Ari Melber

 

“What Do You Call a Good Start?” Award

Faster, please.

 

“Lecture Us Some More About Real Conservatism” Award

National Review

 

“Most In-Depth Investigation Into a Company By That Same Company That Found Absolutely No Wrongdoing at Our Company” Award

NBC News

 

Wild-Eyed Conspiracy Theorist of the Year

Tie…

Tater

Tater

Hogg

 

The “You Gunna Believe Me Or Your Lying Eyes” Award

CNN’s Alisyn Camerota

 

The “Sexual Harassers’ Bestest Media Friend” Award

New York Times’ Amy Chozick

 

The “ROTFLMFAO” Award

Tie…

NBC’s Chuck Todd

CNN Chief Jeff Zucker

 

The “You Might Want To Spend Some Time Outside the Beltway” Award

NBC’s Chuck Todd

 

The “Elephant? What Elephant?” Award

The Daily Beast

 

Failing Upwards Award

CNN’s Chris Cuomo

 

The “Laws are for Little People” Award

New York Magazine’s Olivia Nuzzi

 

The “Don’t Let Me Stop You From Booing a Rape Victim” Award

CNN’s #JakeSoWoke Tapper

 

Fake Doctor of the Year

CNN’s Sanjay Gupta

 

The 2018 Fareed Zakaria Award for Plagiarism

Daily Beast’s Lizzie Crocker

 

The Bruce Willis Award for Government Shutdown Batshit-Crazy

CNN

 

2018’s “Trump’s Presidency Has Already Outlasted Your Career” Award

Michael Wolff

 

“The “Fake-Fake-Fake Newsing Your Way to a Big Promotion” Award

CNN’s Jim Sciutto

Runner Up…

CNN’s Jim Sciutto

 

Until next year….

 

Follow John Nolte on Twitter @NolteNC. Follow his Facebook Page here.

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