The thrill among White House aides for special presidential candy would shame any Oompa Loompa at Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory.
With apparently “so much time and so little to do,” many White House aides spend working hours every Thursday competing for special presidential candy, a phenomenon known inside the administration as “candy pickup day,” Politico reported Tuesday.
Fueling the phenomenon is the “rationed” supply of chocolate candy. Each office inside the White House receives a designated delivery amount, which is quickly gobbled by aides. The excitement in some offices reached such heights that office managers reportedly implemented strict rules to prevent staffers from quickly downing the chocolates.
The candy, doled out by the Navy Mess, comes in custom boxes filled with M&Ms, Hershey Kisses, and other sweets “embossed” with the presidential seal and his signature — similar to a golden ticket.
“People get there so early,” said a White House staffer told Politico. “There’s this one woman who every week is there at the front of the line with her laptop.”
The “hype” for the candy reportedly causes a stir on campus. Described as “amusing” and “insane,” the hoopla excites White House staffers to lie to obtain their fair share.
U.S. President Joe Biden hands out boxes of chocolates during a Halloween trick-or-treat event on the South Lawn of the White House on October 30, 2023 in Washington, DC. (Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images)
“You’ve got to be really confident and basically gaslight them and say that you’re picking up for like X, Y and Z teams. Otherwise, they’ll try to limit how many you can take,” the White House staffer added. “If they question you or you stutter at all, they’ll say no.”
White House aides admit they are crazy about the chocolate, as it makes great, free taxpayer-funded presents. “It’s a way to share this special experience, which often takes us away from friends of family, with the people we love,” the staffer bragged to Politico.
Although some candy is given away, most candy is consumed by eager staffers looking for more calories on low salaries. “Obviously we need our sugar rush to get through the days,” a former White House staffer said.
Despite the comparison, the White House is not “some kind of funhouse” with golden geese laying golden chocolate. Supply runs out, and the first lady’s office gets first dibs on the limited stock.
“In fact, when staffers went to the October candy pick up, they were given Russell Stover marshmallow cream pumpkins — which no one liked,” Politico reported. “They didn’t even have a White House logo.”
Wendell Husebo is a political reporter with Breitbart News and a former GOP War Room Analyst. He is the author of Politics of Slave Morality. Follow Wendell on “X” @WendellHusebø or on Truth Social @WendellHusebo.
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