It's Called Christmas-Get Over It!

It’s that time of year again — that festive time when jolly elves put up Christmas Trees, Christmas Villages and advertise Christmas sales. All is merry and bright for a few days until those abominables with their frosty souls terrorize the town square screaming bloody murder about the word “Christmas.” These misers and their deplorable lawyers tear down the signs, trounce on cherished religious symbols and conspire new ways to ‘censor the season’ while politicians scurry like mice and the merry citizenry scratch their heads.

The abominables latest conquest: the Philadelphia Christmas Village.

A group of well meaning German Americans recently decided to set up a private outdoor Christmas Village in Philadelphia reminiscent of the 15th Century German markets that are still popular today where merchants peddle all sorts of treasured items, many of them hand-made. A popular celebration of a cultural tradition that mixes in capitalism — what could be more American? The problem was the word: Christmas. The reason given (and used frequently) is that the term is “offensive.” While it is apparently considered less offensive to inflate giant union protest rats outside businesses, fly gay pride banners, hold naked flashmobs, or build Mosques steps from Ground Zero… in a free country something is always offensive to someone, so get over it!

This year, the abominables didn’t even wait until December 1st. While Germans have celebrated Christmas Villages for over 500 years with little problem, The American Christmas Village was barely in its third year before the screams and protests began toppling the traditions. Crews were dispatched yesterday to remove the word “Christmas” from the sign that welcomes visitors to the market – did I mention it’s a private market? It will be replaced by the word: Holiday.

A “Holiday Village” is the washed-down, homogenized phraseology that pretends those stands of Christmas nutcrackers are merely selling kitchen utensils, the Christmas decorations are glassware. A “Holiday Village” would work for Presidents Day, Labor day — do those holidays need Villages too?

As one observer put it: ‘go to Munich and ask where the “Holiday Village” is and they would look at you like you were crazy.’ Yes, Americans are being driven crazy by the abominables.

The abomidables are at work everywhere — they threw Mary and Jesus figurines out of the town square, they tried changing the Christmas Tree in front of the U.S. Capitol into a “Holiday Tree,” they hammer businesses to remove all traces of Christmas. When was the last time you heard “Merry Christmas” at the store after you purchased a present? You are more likely to get “Happy Holidays” — do we buy presents for a ‘holiday’ or for Christmas, anyway? Red and green are replaced by green and orange — stars and snow are exceedingly popular decorations. Angels and Three Wise Men… Not so much.

Those abomidables were successful in challenging and overwhelming local governments to remove Christmas, they long ago moved into the private sector and right into our private lives. Macy’s ad campaign asks us simply to: “Believe.” In what — Holidays? Yes, sure. In that case, I also believe in a good cigar and a 2000 French Bordeaux — but I’m not going out and buying anyone a new sweater because of it! Starbucks store décor has also toned down in recent years — this year, displays simply ask us to “Share.” Their Starbucks cards covered in snowflakes are neatly organized in a display that recommends we “Stuff them in stockings.” Oh? Would that be “Christmas stockings?” Or is there a new tradition of holiday stockings? Because I know Americans can’t wait until we hang our sweaty Labor Day socks by the fire!