Guantanamo Bay Prisoner’s Match.com Profile: ‘Detained, but Ready to Mingle’

Guantánamo Bay is not standing in the way of prisoner Muhammad Rahim al-Afghani’s desire to find love. His lawyer Carlos Warner runs an account for the terrorist on Match.com.

The former alleged associate of Osama bin Laden placed “detained, but ready to mingle” in his tag line. He set up the account in 2012.

“I was visiting him a few years ago and, as always, brought him some magazines,” stated Warner. “At the time online dating wasn’t as big as it is now, and he found it fascinating. He asked if we could set up a profile so I did. We decided on two: Plenty Of Fish and Match.com. But Plenty Of Fish required too much classified information – date of birth, exact location. So we went with Match.com.”

The CIA arrested Rahim in 2007 in Pakistan when authorities transferred him to the Guantánamo Bay facility that houses numerous alleged terrorists. The Justice Department claims he helped the Taliban in the 1990s, which led him to work for al-Qaeda. Authorities did not provide many details on his arrest. They also do not have a planned date to put him on trial.

Warner claims the profile receives plenty of matches, especially from the Caribbean.

“He finds it very funny that some woman in Jamaica might be pining for him even though he’s open about the fact that he’s in Guantánamo,” added Warner.

Rahim has refused to use Tinder, a smartphone app that rapidly matches people seeking romantic relationships. Warner explained that the app “confuses him” since he does not “really understand what a smartphone is.”

The CIA unclassified letters from Rahim to Warner from this summer. He shows an admiration for pop culture, modern technology, and South Dakota.

In December, Al-Jazeera released other letters from Rahim to Warner dated 2012. He wrote about LeBron James and the YouTube hit “Gangnam Style.” He told Warner he wants to perform the famous dance, but his shackles prevent his movement.

“Please as to have this changed,” he wrote.

He also lashed out at James, who left the Cleveland Cavaliers for the Miami Heat in 2010. Rahim also provided a few tips to Warner in case he played basketball against President Barack Obama.

“If you play basketball with Obama, take him straight to the post,” he said. “You are bigger, stronger and younger.”

Rahim devoted one letter to reward cards in America:

In previous letters, he asked Warner to reach out to Amanda Palmer and “[A]sk her to write a song about me and my family.” He also adopted a banana rat, which is common at the prison.

“Tell the guards to leave my friend alone,” he demanded. “They need to chillax.”