Boris Johnson has a premature ejaculation problem.

I refer, of course, not to the British Prime Minister’s well-practised performance in the bedroom but to his outburst — his ejaculation*, if you will — on Twitter over the weekend when he congratulated Joe Biden on ‘his election as President of the United States.’

(*Oxford English Dictionary: 2. dated Something said quickly and suddenly.)

This ejaculation is premature, unseemly and could turn out to be very messy.

Sure, it is possible that Joe Biden may end up the next President of the USA. But it’s also possible, pending legal claims and recounts, that he may not. That decision will be made next month when the Electoral College meets. Contrary to current fashionable belief, the presidency is not decided and announced by the Mainstream Media, nor by Big Tech, nor does fake news suddenly become true when the British Prime Minister has tweeted it out with his fat fingers on his mobile phone. To act as if it does is a grave error on the part of Boris Johnson and, not for the first time in Johnson’s lamentable career, does his country a huge disservice.

One of the jobs of the British prime minister is to forge a healthy working relationship with whoever happens to be in the Oval Office. How, exactly, does Bojo think it will help if he sucks up to the left-wing candidate – who may yet prove the loser – while ignoring and insulting his more natural ally Donald Trump with whom he may have to deal with the next four years?

Still, perhaps we should be grateful to Johnson for confirming what some of us have long feared: that he is a fully signed up member of the Green Blob.

This claim in Johnson’s tweet that ‘climate change’ is one of the United Kingdom’s ‘shared priorities’ with the US…

Really? I wonder how many of the voters who gave Boris Johnson’s Conservatives their 80-seat majority at the last General Election did so in order to get higher electricity prices, more bat-chomping, bird-slicing eco-crucifixes ruining their favourite landscapes and seascapes, more green taxes and regulation.

Very few, I suspect. Britain did not vote Conservative so that the economy and the environment could be put in the hands of eco-fascist loons like Lord (‘Zac’) Goldsmith or Johnson’s current girlfriend, green activist Carrie Symonds.

Most British people currently have much, much bigger things to worry about than paying homage to the Carbon Fairy: the destruction of their jobs, their businesses and the economy by a supposedly Conservative government, for example.

Or is Boris so busy ejaculating all over his imaginary friend Joe Biden that he has failed to notice?