Donald Trump owes Harry and Meghan a huge debt of gratitude. They have made quite possibly the best ‘Vote Trump’ promo video evah!
Imagine, for a moment, that you were an undecided voter — toying which way to vote, or wondering whether even to bother voting at all — when suddenly you caught sight of Harry and Meghan’s latest, desperate self-promotion exercise.
You see a couple sitting on a park bench in the spacious grounds of their typical, ordinary, multi-million dollar home in Santa Barbara, California. On screen left, there’s a slightly awkward looking, twitchy ginger bloke; screen right, there’s an attractive dark-haired woman who is clearly the dominant partner in the relationship. If she were a spider, she’d devour the timid male sitting next to her without a second’s thought.
“Why am I watching this earnest duo telling me stuff in their stilted way? [The ginger bloke is especially stilted. The Black Widow has clearly had some kind of media training]” you wonder.
The couple speak. But it’s still not at all clear that they have anything of interest to say.
First, the Black Widow burbles patronisingly about how “you” matter, like, you’re really, really special and she really, really cares about you. Which you just know she doesn’t.
Then the ensnared Beta Male, who turns out to be some kind of ex-member of the British Royal Family, confides that back home in England he was never allowed to vote.
“And I care about this, why?” you ask yourself. “Isn’t the whole point about the British Royal Family — whether ex- or current — that we stopped having to listen to them when we gained our independence in 1776?”
The ex-prince witters on about how “This November it’s vital that we reject hate speech, misinformation and online negativity.”
Your bullshit antennae twitch. You recognise this as liberal-leftist code for the usual liberal-leftist preoccupations: the war on free speech; the war on any media that doesn’t produce liberal-leftist propaganda; the war on anyone who wants to say on the Internet what they really think about Black Lives Matter, Antifa, Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, CNN, or any of the other the leftist forces currently hell-bent on destroying America.
What you realise is that the couple, without saying it directly, are trying to persuade you to vote Joe Biden.
Then the Black Widow speaks again.
“As we work to reimagine the world around us…”
(That’ll be code for the Great Reset: the communitarian New World Order which the socialist global elite wants to impose on us.)
“…Let’s challenge ourselves to build communities of compassion.”
(She means Black Lives Matter, probably. She’s a fan.)
Beta Male has a few more words he’d like to impart. Wife studies him as he speaks, like a proud macaw owner listening to the words she has carefully taught her parrot to say.
“Tonight reminds us of how important it is to watch out for each other. To care for each other and inspire each other.”
You think: “This is just insulting now. Is he seriously suggesting that caring for one another is something people only ever do if they vote Democrat?”
Beta Male draws to his conclusion:
“We are incredibly proud to join you in this historic moment in time.”
You think: “Proud? Really? Of what exactly? How is it any kind of achievement to sit on a bench in a $14 million garden with a fawning film crew and burble sub-therapy-session platitudes at a camera? How can you be so deluded as not to realise that this whole exercise is patronising, intelligence-insulting and guaranteed to have the opposite of the one you hoped for.”
All the video needs to make sense is a caption at the end — and it would be perfect.
“To avoid all this crap, Vote Donald Trump!” it should say.
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