CNN has just produced a list of “Five Things You Can Do About Climate Change”. They are: Become Informed; Make Changes At Home; Be Greener At The Office; Reduce Emissions In Transit; Get Involved And Educate Others About The Big Picture.

Here at Breitbart we agree entirely with the broad principle of these noble objectives. It’s only on the detail that we differ slightly.

1. Become Informed.

Every even half-way educated person ought to know by now that global mean temperature has flatlined since 1997. This means that no child under 17 has ever lived through a period of “global warming”. It also drives a coach and horses through the “anthropogenic global warming” (AGW) theory so assiduously championed by the scientific establishment for the last three decades. After all, if CO2 levels have continued to rise – especially thanks to industrial development in China – how come, as all the climate alarmists’ computer models predicted, world temperatures haven’t followed suit?

Clearly it is time for a rethink. As an informed citizen, you can do your bit by advising your children not to believe the politicized rubbish taught them by their geography and science teachers at school; warn your political representatives that if they carry on wasting taxpayers’ money on this nonsense they’re not going to get your vote; write letters to newspapers and TV channels asking why they’re not doing their due dilligence and exposing the most expensive scientific fraud in the history of mankind.

2. Make changes at home.

There are lots of things you could do to make home life more comfortable for yourself and your family: ditch flickery, cold, dim low energy light bulbs and replace them with old-school incandescent ones that enable you to see what you’re doing; turn up the heating as the winters get colder; spend less time recycling which, besides being a colossal waste of man-hours as you divide your trash into any number of coloured sacks, probably costs more energy than it saves and can, in any case, be done by commercial machinery these days so why should you be giving free labour to the environmental zealots?

Tragically, however, your options for rebellion here are limited. Thanks to government regulation, incandescent light bulbs are almost impossible to obtain; your energy bills – thanks to the massive state subsidies paid for compulsory renewables – have been driven so unaffordably high that heating is now a luxury; and if you don’t recycle you get fined by your local authority.

Still if you’re really desperate you can do what toads and snakes sometimes do in winter: bury yourself inside your compost bin and try and warm yourself with the ambient heat generated by the decomposing vegetable matter.

3. Be Greener At The Office.

If you are the CEO of a large corporation, consider sacking your Head of Sustainability. The business of business is to create value for shareholders and you certainly aren’t going to do that by ramping up your overheads with worthless departments dedicated to feelgood environmental schemes.

Even if you are not the CEO you can still make a difference. For example, has your office canteen been suckered by some greenie do-gooders into sourcing locally-grown, organic food? If so, campaign for change! Note that “organic” is a decadent Western fad which does nothing for the needs of the world’s growing population (that’s what GM and fossil-fuel-fertiliser and industrial agriculture are for). Note to that – as per Liberal Curmudgeon Stephen Budiansky – that imported food, even when shipped by air, is often far more energy efficient than locally grown produce and has the added virtue of helping producers in the developing world.

4. Reduce Emissions In Transit

The key thing here is to avoid electric cars. Even before it rolls off the production line, an electric car has created far more CO2 than a conventional one. That’s because the manufacturing process – notably the energy used to create its battery and mine the lithium – is so un-eco-friendly.

Avoid also using bio-fuels, one of the most environmentally damaging forms of energy available. In Asia and Africa, the demand in the West for mandated bio-fuels has led to the replacement of rainforest with plantations of industrial palm oil; it has also driven up food prices by diverting agricultural land for food production, thus harming the world’s poor who are especially vulnerable to starvation.

Also avoid extensive jet travel – not because it isn’t fun and good and useful and much cheaper than it was thirty years ago, but because you run a severe risk of being mistaken for leading environmental campaigners like Al Gore, the IPCC’s Rajendra Pachauri and the Prince of Wales, all of whom fly tirelessly around the world every to warn anyone who’ll listen about the terrifying relationship between air miles and catastrophic climate change.

5. Get Involved And Educate Others About The Big Picture

You may feel powerless in the face of so much green bullshit but you really can make a difference. Here’s one thing you can do right now: write to Greenpeace/Friends of the Earth/The Sierra Club/The Nature Conservancy/WWF/RSPB/the Audubon Society/etc and explain why you’re cancelling your subscription. Every one of them has been hijacked by green ideologues who seem to care less about saving the planet than they do ramping up scare stories (to raise revenues from credulous idiots), promoting junk science, and indulging rent-seeking crony capitalists like the companies making a killing (literally, in the case of the birds and bats they slice and dice) in the wind farm industry.

Then spread the word. Really, it’s not to late to save the world from the creeping menace of eco fascism.