A drought of appealing movies has forced 3,000 American movie theaters to offer a one-day ticket price of $3.00 this coming Saturday, September 3.
They are calling it National Cinema Day, and of the 40,700 screens in this country, 30,000 are on board for this Labor Day weekend discount.
Oh, and they are also re-releasing an extended version of the stridently non-woke Spider-Man: No Way Home to entice people to return to the movies.
The woketard Hollywood trades keep claiming that the box office blues result from a lack of product released between August and November, which is when the new Black Panther movie hits.
That’s not the problem.
Since early August, nearly 30 new titles have earned a theatrical release.
The problem is not a lack of product.
The problem is a lack of product that is of any interest to any normal, everyday American. The only exceptions appear to be Brad Pitt’s Bullet Train, which is doing okay, and Iris Elba’s Beast, which is doing less okay. But there are all kinds of new movies out there. So there is no drought of product, just a drought of appealing product because Hollywood spends a gazillion dollars a month making movies for everyone but everyday Americans.
But there are no blockbusters! scream the trades.
Oh, well, why are the no blockbusters?
There should be plenty of blockbusters because there are plenty of franchises, right?. I mean, there are Star Wars, X-Men, Men in Black, Charlie’s Angels, Space Jam, Suicide Squad, Harley Quinn, Terminator, Kings Men, Toy Story… Oh, that’s right, Hollywood woketards killed all those franchises, which made it a whole lot more difficult to produce enough blockbusters to fill this two-month hole that might just force the world’s second-biggest theater chain into bankruptcy.
As the streaming services stall out and stumble, theatrical is doing worse, and all those problems, every one of them, can be traced back to lousy product no one wants to see. And the biggest reason most of that product is so lousy is woke… Woke lectures, woke hectoring, woke insults, insufferable woke characters, and woke, woke, woke, woke…
And now, thanks to woke, things are so desperate that Hollywood is re-releasing the non-woke Spider-Man: No Way Home and dropping ticket prices to $3.00.
Think about just how desperate that is.
Hey, we know that all we release is insulting garbage that isn’t entertaining, so how about watching a rerun for $3.00?
Genius.
I have an idea… How about making good movies normal people enjoy? You know, escapist stuff with sex, adventure, romance, thrills, chills, laughs, and no gay sex or attacks on the patriarchy, or smug, uptight “heroes” shaming us about what we believe and hold dear?
You think that might work?
Well, it only did for about a hundred years…
And that’s why we call you WOKETARDS.
Follow John Nolte on Twitter @NolteNC. Follow his Facebook Page here.