The 2022 Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards was a real snooze, a showcase in self-absorbed snobbery from some of Hollywood most smug elites. Luckily, we’re ignoring that here and just judging the fashion on the red carpet.
Come judge along.
Best Dressed: Jessica Chastain in Dior Haute Couture
Okay, I know this is a controversial top best dressed choice because it’s not the usual gown and updo but let me explain. This Dior Haute Couture suit is a hard look to wear. The pants can’t get wrinkled (an impossible task), her pose has to be just right so she doesn’t literally look like she’s walking on stilts, and the tailored jacket closes with a single clasp — ladies, can you imagine?
And yet, there is an effortlessness to Chastain’s outfit of choice. It’s all very meticulous, planned weeks in advance, but comes together with her waved middle-part, stacked earrings, and fresh smokey eye in a seamless fashion.
It’s the hard made easy, a vibe that we could only hope comes back in these forced-style, Instagram times.
Worst Dressed: Reese Witherspoon in Schiaparelli
As gorgeous as she may be, there’s nothing Reese Witherspoon can do to save this Schiaparelli frock from ending up on the top of my worst dressed — not even that Cartier earrings and necklace set.
For starters, can we cut the curly Qs off the ends of the neckline? Why is the décolleté framed with identical surfer waves? Likewise, the cut of the skirt doesn’t do anything for her and the baby blue sash is all too Bridesmaids circa 2011.
Best Dressed: Nicole Kidman in Saint Laurent
Nicole Kidman in this regal Saint Laurent number is a timeless piece that won’t ever date in the history books. Made from rich velvet and topped with a white tuxedo bow at the neckline, there’s not much Kidman had to add to this beautifully cut gown from one of fashion’s greatest, Anthony Vaccarello.
Although, the red lips are a nice touch.
Best Dressed: Elle Fanning in Gucci
Elle Fanning in this Gucci tuxedo ensemble speaks mostly for itself. A breathtaking woman, with porcelain features, in a menswear-inspired get-up is a classic recipe that can hardly go wrong.
My favorite part of this look is that rather than add on the tuxedo jacket to match the glittering wide-leg pants, she threw the jacket on the floor at home and walked out the door. Vests are highly underrated.
Worst Dressed: Jared Leto in Gucci
So, Colonel Sanders showed up to the red carpet last night. I guess there’s a first for everything?
But seriously, Jared Leto in this Gucci suit reminds me yet again why Alessandro Michele’s ethos at this mega fashion house is growing tiresome. I had just seen the latest collection and thought “Wait, maybe I don’t hate this all that much.”
Nope, wrong. Sometimes if you name all that’s in *one* look it makes you realize how ridiculous it is. So let’s start: Shoulder pads, velvet tie, white shirt, baby blue satin, beard, dishwashing gloves, bell bottoms, thigh creases, white leather boots, sunglasses. Are you sick of it yet?
Best Dressed: Hoyeon Jung in Louis Vuitton
Hoyeon Jung (you may have seen her in that little ‘ole show Squid Game) is a breath of fresh air in this Louis Vuitton black beaded gown. There’s a throwback tone to the neckline on this dress with its late 1990s spaghetti straps.
Perhaps the most demure aspect is how the gown begins with thick silver buttons down the bodice before opening to show off Jung’s legs and black strappy heels. There’s a Chanel-like quality to the beadwork and buttons, almost as if Nicolas Ghesquière is paying homage to the great Karl Lagerfeld.
Worst Dressed: Cynthia Erivo in Louis Vuitton
Every time I look at Cynthia Erivo’s Louis Vuitton dress and cape, I find something else to despise. The septum ring could work, honestly, if only it had anything to do with the gown. The pleather gown could work if it were cut at tea length and she burned the muppet’s cape in a bonfire never to be seen again.
The earrings will never work. Throw them in the bonfire with the cape.
Best Dressed: Andrew Garfield in Saint Laurent
I was waiting to see which man of the night would best pull off the suit of the hour — that is, a 1970s-style wider pant leg, wider lapel, and broader shoulders. Andrew Garfield in this pinstripe Saint Laurent two-piece suit is an updated, edgier take on Yves Saint Laurent himself.
The juxtaposition of various stripes (check out his shirt and tie) work better than expected and his almond toe shoes are fittingly in tune with that 70s flare that his pants embody.
Worst Dressed: Faith Hill in Dior Haute Couture
Seeing Faith Hill dressed and styled so poorly was sort of the shocker of the night. Her best red carpet look to date, without a doubt, is her 2000 Grammy Awards plunging black leather gown that she wore alongside Tim McGraw.
This speckled silver gown on SAG night may be Dior Haute Couture, but there’s nothing fashion about it. Truthfully, it’s a toga with hoop earrings, strappy heels, and curling iron hair.
Also, can we go back to blonde? Can I have my childhood Faith Hills back? What is this bottled hair dye brown doing on our country music icon?
Best Dressed: Dasha Nekrasova in Valentino
First off, if you’re not listening to the “Red Scare” podcast, are you even living? Second, Dasha Nekrasova’s choice of a bright pink chiffon gown from Valentino is a total home run.
Paired with a lightly combed back updo, a burgundy clutch, and matching pout pink doll lips, Dasha’s ability to appear as though she’s been tangled up in the fabrics of the Valentino cutting room before gliding out the door is something to behold.
John Binder is a reporter for Breitbart News. Email him at jbinder@breitbart.com. Follow him on Twitter here.