This is why America hates Hollywood.
Late night “funny” man Jimmy Kimmel delivered a heart-wrenching monologue Monday night that every mother and every father could relate to.
In the emotion-drunk moments last month after the birth of their son — still in the hospital room surrounded by nurses and euphoric family — he and his wife watched their boy turn blue and got the terrifying news that something was wrong with his heart. Or lungs. Or both.
Mr. Kimmel called it the “longest three hours of my life” as more nurses and doctors and machines crowded into the room and his little infant boy was cut open for emergency open-heart surgery. Which, thank the Lord, was successful.
Understandably, Mr. Kimmel could not get through the story without breaking down in tears throughout the telling.
And then his monologue went horribly awry.
Here was this moment highlighting the preciousness of life, the heroism of nurses, the unmatched expertise of surgeons and the magical power of family. And what is the point of it all for Jimmy Kimmel?
Politics. Grubby, dirty politics.
“I want to say one other thing,” Mr. Kimmel said after thanking all the people who just saved his baby son’s life, spared his family from a lifelong misery and supported them all through the whole traumatic ordeal.
“President Trump last month proposed a $6 billion cut in funding to the National Institute of Health,” the “funny” man continued. “And, thank God, our congressmen made a deal last night to not go along with that.”
It was suddenly as if instead of bringing forth into life an exquisite bundle of joy, Mr. Kimmel had been handed a stupid golden statue. And as if at the Oscars, the dirty, self-absorbed, narcissistic exhibitionist could not help himself but step into the klieg lights and start blubbering about politics.
“They actually increased funding by $2 billion. And I applaud them for doing that. Because more than 40 percent of the people who would have been affected by those cuts to the National Institutes of Health are children. And it would have a major impact on a lot of great places, including Children’s Hospital in Los Angeles,” he sobbed. “Which is so unbelievably sad to me.”
After his slobbering wet kiss to federal bureaucracy, Mr. Kimmel then went squealing on about Obamacare and how insurance companies, the government and your neighbors should all be forced to pay for everybody else’s health care. (Easy thing to say for a gazillionaire from Hollywood.)
I mean, really, Jimmy, does your newborn child not mean more to you than petty politics? How do you look at the miracle of your child and think — partisan politics!
That is not to say he didn’t also lie and claim to be above partisan politics — even as he was pushing exactly that.
“Let’s stop this nonsense,” he said. “This isn’t football; there are no teams. We are the team — it’s the United States. Don’t let their partisan squabbles divide us on something every decent person wants.”
Yes, that’s right. He just had a kid and the kid nearly died and he wants you to know that if you are not for bloated federal bureaucracy, socialized medicine, higher taxes and tons of more debt piled onto your grandchildren, then you are not a “decent person.”
Actually Jim, if you were a “decent person,” you would shut your fat trap about partisan politics and go care for your kid, who just nearly died, you elitist creep.
• Charles Hurt can be reached at charleshurt@live.com; follow him on Twitter via @charleshurt.