The year’s worst film squandered two terrific actresses and embraced our darkest fears about the moral decay championed on screen. Its biggest sin? Not being so awful it could join classic clunkers like The Room and Troll 2. It came close, though.

1. Adore: Robin Wright and Naomi Watts star as 40-something stunners who live an idyllic life on an Australian coast. They both have a grown son and through a weak twist of fate each woman starts an affair with the other’s child. What follows alternates between head-scratching stupidity and moral confusion on a grand scale. Had Adore treated its story with Airplane!-style mockery it might have gotten away with the ugly characters we’re meant to care about.

2. The Big Wedding: Hollywood remains a young person’s game, witness how many fine older stars signed on for this misbegotten rom-com. Robert De Niro, Diane Keaton, Susan Sarandon and Robin Williams check their dignity at the door in this tale of wedding chaos with a dash of religious mockery. Hide your eyes as De Niro torments his legacy in a too embarrassing to describe sexual encounter.

3. Paradise: What do you get when you hire a neophyte director to guide yet another attempt to smear people of faith? Paradise is even worse than you fear, full of condescending characters and laugh-free exchanges. Writer/first-time director Diablo Cody of Juno fame should be ashamed for stuffing so many ugly stereotypes into 90 minutes. The film sneaked into a few theaters while simultaneously poisoning the well of first-run Video on Demand options.

4. Only God Forgives: Ryan Gosling is the Steve McQueen of our era, an actor who prefers to speak as little as possible. You can’t blame him for keeping quiet throughout Forgives, a revenge tale stripped of every B-movie element that might grab our attention. Instead, we’re left with artistic pretension at the haughtiest level. We keep waiting for a great fight scene, a meaningful moment or at least a sense of purpose. Then the end credits roll and said hopes fade to black.

5. Elysium: District 9 director Neill Blomkamp went from the next sci-fi auteur to a second-rate M. Night Shyamalan in record time. This bloated allegory for immigration casts Matt Damon as a sad sack trying to save his life after being exposed to a toxic level of radiation. Poor action sequences, silly characters and heavy-handed progressive politics turn a potentially intriguing tale into a slag of sci-fi wreckage.

Dishonorable Mention: After Earth, The Lone Ranger, Machete Kills, You’re Next and White House Down