I don’t get why people hated The Green Hornet so much. Granted, I’m no long-time fan of the character, my knowledge of The Green Hornet begins and ends with the fact that the mighty Bruce Lee played Kato in an incarnation on TV show. So I can’t say I was horrified and filled with impotent geek rage over seeing Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg transform my favorite obscure superhero property into a goofball action-packed bromance with stoner-comedy appeal.
In The Green Hornet, a disturbingly svelte Seth Rogen plays Britt Reid, the spoiled, obnoxious playboy son of a newspaper mogul (Tom Wilkinson), whose sudden death leaves the irresponsible Britt in charge of his news empire. In the wake of his father’s passing, he meets Kato, the family mechanic, played by show-stealing Taiwanese musician Jay Chou. After a night of crazy hijinks, the two decide to become a crime-fighting duo that pose as master criminals with the help of propaganda courtesy of Britt’s paper, so their enemies can’t use innocents against them. This attracts the attention of the violent-yet-insecure crime overlord Chudnofsky (Oscar-winner Christoph Waltz), and hilarity ensues.
I can’t think of another superhero film that doubles so well as a bromance, any of the Batman films featuring Robin are too soaked in high-camp stupidity for anyone to care. The closest thing I can think of is John Carpenter’s Big Trouble in Little China, with Jay Chou being Wang Chi to Seth Rogen’s Jack Burton. The Green Hornet in this movie is the arrogant, smirking white dude who thinks he’s awesome when he’s really pathetic and obnoxious, while Kato is really the guy who’s got the moves and the mad skills to the point of being practically magical.
Something I’ve always disliked about modern comedy is how the physical element has gone the way of the Dodo, however The Green Hornet is simply filled with hilarious action set-pieces that are brilliantly executed. Of course, it’s not a return to the eye-popping daredevilry of Buster Keaton or the diamond-cut timing of the Marx brothers, but it’s a surprisingly apt offering from students of the Judd Apatow school of comedy, which primarily values improv dialogue over everything else.
The Green Hornet is being released on, among other formats, 3D Blu-ray. While I saw the movie in 3D in the theater, I can’t recommend seeing it in the medium, never mind that I find the very idea of watching movies in 3D at home ridiculous. Aside from the neato end credit sequence, the film wasn’t shot in 3D, but was retrofitted after the fact. Such cheap use of 3D is worth no one’s time or money, stick to the non-3D Blu-ray.
Available on 3D Blu-ray, Blu-ray, and DVD
I think most of us remember Ron Howard’s The Dilemma as that movie where Vince Vaughn called electric cars “gay,” causing GLAAD to have a fit and lose their collective minds. GLAAD is a well-intentioned, yet woefully misguided special interest group. Their quest to censor a fart of a movie like The Dilemma, while gays are persecuted and murdered in other parts for the world for simply being who they are, is telling. Vaughn’s “gay” crack in The Dilemma is about as harmless as they come, what The Dilemma needs to get flack for is for the simple fact that it’s a bad movie.
The romantic comedy is a genre that has been suffering creatively for some time, its place in mainstream cinema seems to have been replaced with the bromance, as brought on by the Judd Apatow school, which The Green Hornet also obviously owes a debt. The Dilemma fits well within the bromance genre, but it’s one that resides at the very bottom of the barrel. Vince Vaughn plays Ronny, a recovering gambling-addict who is developing new electric car technology with his partner and best bud, Nick, played by Kevin James. Ronny gets into this titular pickle when he spies Nick’s wife, Geneva (Winona Ryder) getting a little too friendly with a young stud (Channing Tatum). Worried that this devastating news may ruin his pal’s marriage, their business, and their friendship, Ronny tries to keep the secret to himself, but instead his life quickly starts to spin out of control.
The Dilemma is about as painfully pedestrian and boring as the weakest rom-com Hollywood has to offer. The plot is one of those frustrating stories that is only allowed to continue because the characters converse like complete morons. If anyone in the plot behaved like anything that resembles a rational human being, the movie would end before the one-hour-mark. This would be acceptable if the characters were secretive in a way that enhanced the plot thematically, like in City Island or Secrets and Lies, but The Dilemma smacks of mere contrivance.
Ron Howard has always bored me as a director, usually he’s content to make Oscar-bait pap like Cinderella Man, or dull so-called thrillers like The Da Vinci Code. He’s a journeyman who is good at either picking boring material, or making good material boring, the fact that he is set to do Stephen King’s The Dark Tower is mildly distressing to me. However, Howard doing a comedy with Vince Vaughn was truly baffling, but the results were just as boorish and unfortunate as Vaughn’s other recent films. I don’t dislike Vaughn, I saw his Wild West Comedy Show live a few years back, and I thought it was pretty great. He needs to stop playing the loudmouth from Swingers over and over again, and get back to work.
Other Noteworthy Releases
Fat Girl: I can only describe Catherine Breillat’s Fat Girl as horrifying and uncomfortable. It’s an exploration of sibling rivalry and pubescent sexual desire that’s about as subtle as a brick to the teeth. This week, Criterion is upgrading their edition to Blu-ray. Personally I can’t recommend this movie to anyone, as its tone is about as hateful as movies get, it’s an experience that requires a long shower after the fact.
Available on Blu-ray. Previously available on DVD
Smiles of a Summer Night: Another Criterion Blu-ray update, this one being Ingmar Bergman’s first international success as a filmmaker. This is one of those essential Bergman films I have yet to see, so it’s high time for one to discover it.
Available on Blu-ray. Previously available on DVD
From Dusk Till Dawn: This movie is the most fun I’ve had with a Robert Rodriguez flick, largely thanks to Quentin Tarantino’s fun, freaky script. Sadly, Rodriguez has since devolved into the practice of filming himself playing with toys in his backyard. His defenders point to his ability to work really fast on the set, as well as his ability to do a ton of different tasks at once. I say that is precisely why his movies are rarely good. I do enjoy From Dusk Till Dawn, but not enough to trade in my special edition DVD for this Blu-ray upgrade.
Available on Blu-ray. Previously available on DVD
My Own Love Song: A road movie starring Renée Zellweger, Forest Whitaker, and Nick Nolte. It says it has music by Bob Dylan, but I suspect they just tossed a bunch of standard Dylan tunes in there.
Penn & Teller – Bullshit! Season 8: Outspoken Vegas atheists/libertarians/magicians Penn & Teller continue their never ending crusade to expose nonsense and snake oil in the spirit of Harry Houdini. Results may vary.
Available on DVD
Pick of the Week: The Green Hornet
This article originally appeared over at Parcbench.com
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