Lady Gaga Judges No One … Except the U.S. Military

Is there no end to the many talents of Lady Gaga, already recognized as the greatest Madonna impersonator of this century? Of course we all know her as a singer, musician, fashionista and female impersonator, but recently she has revealed herself as maven in two new areas: military expert and political advisor.

It started at the MTV Video Music Awards. That is ironic in itself since I think that MTV stopped being a music channel sometime in the 1990’s. Ms. Gaga, (I don’t know if “Lady” is a title or simply the first part of her pseudonym) appeared in a costume made of meat. When asked the meaning of her get-up by Ellen DeGeneres, she explained it wasn’t a slam on vegans.

“As you know, I am the most judgment-free human being on the earth,” Gaga replied.

Wow! Did the irony of that statement knock anyone else down into their La-Z-Boy? That might be the truest thing she has ever said. It wasn’t too long ago that having judgment skills was considered a plus. Not anymore!

Be that as it may, the whole idea was to call attention to the plight of gay folks in the military. If you don’t see the linkage between “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” narcissistic self- indulgence and wearing a Porterhouse, come on over and sit on the terminally un-hip bench with me while I try to figure it out.

Ms. Gaga went on to explain that her being accompanied by some disgruntled former employees of the military was a political protest:

“For me this evening, if we don’t stand up for what we believe in and if we don’t fight for our rights pretty soon, we’re going to have as much rights as the meat on own bones. And, I am not a piece of meat.”

I am not really sure what that means, either. I am a fairly hefty guy and I have a lot of meat on my bones. So are my rights safe? Perhaps Ms. Gaga is trying to tell us that DADT is somehow linked to anorexia in the fashion industry. Ahhh, now it’s all starting to come together.

She went on to say:

“It is a devastation to me that I know my fans who are gay . . . feel like they have government oppression on them.”

Not that there “is” government oppression but that they “feel” there is oppression.

Later she “tweeted” to Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid and the Senator was smitten with Lady Gaga. They tweeted back and forth for days! That is, if you think they do their own “tweeting.” I believe that both have people who do this job for them and the job title is “Twit.” There is probably a Head Twit and several Assistant Twits. I imagine Lady Gaga and Harry Reid are surrounded by Twits.

Perhaps he is just looking for his next gig when he finds himself unemployed in November.