As usual, Sean Penn just can’t say enough bad things about America — and could he be more humorless? The real story here, however, is Penn’s relentlessly brutal trashing of the Fugee’s Wyclef Jean as some kind of stooge for American corporate interests. In-between a ton of innuendo and phrases like “I don’t know,” and “allegedly,” Penn’s obviously attempting to strangle the rapper’s bid to be the next Haitian president in the cradle.


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If Jean, who was born in Haiti, is smart, he’ll rip a page from the Barack Obama playbook, not answer any of Penn’s charges and simply write the actor off as a racist.

Oh, wait, maybe that’s not so smart.

Who knows, Penn might be right about Jean. Then again, Penn might just be an elitist, socialist, narcissist, busybody who sees himself as the Great White Liberal Hope of Haiti which somehow makes it okay for him to poke his ignorant movie star nose into the domestic politics of a country other than his own (not that he’s a whole lot of help here).

I think you all know where my money is.

My initial reaction — not that I’ve been able to summon enough interest to study up on it — was to cynically assume Jean was a celebrity opportunist looking to burnish his ego with an attention-getting political bid. Now that I discover Penn agreeing with me, it’s time to completely rethink that position. And from the looks of that earthquake ravaged country, a little American corporate interest is exactly what they need. So…

Wyclef Jean — Yes Haiti Can!

Regardless, I’m sure we can all agree that there’s no better way to enter the promise of a new weekend than with a couple of Hollywoodists ripping one another apart.

Happy Friday!

UPDATE: Over at the HuffPo Mr. Corporate Interest himself writes an open letter to America explaining his decision to run for office in Haiti. Here’s a snip:

With Halliburton’s funding, Blackwater’s military backing, Diebold’s voting machines, and WalMart’s discounts, Haiti can finally become the garish strip mall all Americans want it to be.

Kidding. Read for yourself.

UPDATE II: Almost against my will, more info about this comes my way:

Jean has a $2.1 million tax lien and sure, he has cheated his own charity and the people who have donated to it, using funds to pay his alleged mistress.

So what exactly is Penn’s objection? Jean appears to be as corrupt as Hugo and Castro? Is it that Jean’s not enough of a dictator?

Unsolicited advice for the rapper/presidential candidate: If you want Penn’s support announce that as President you will immediately shut down opposition television stations, throw your political opponents in jail, rail against the U.S., allow Oliver Stone to make a documentary about you, and peddle around Port-au-Prince on your little sister’s bike.

UPDATE III: Jean discusses his reasons for running with CNN here. There’s also a response to his tax and charity scandals.