Please Whoopi Goldberg, Change Your Last Name

I have a request for Whoopi Goldberg. I wish that she would go back to using her birth name Caryn Johnson, at least the Johnson part. Because of her adopted last name, some people may think she may be Jewish. To be perfectly honest there is enough anti-Semitism in the world without people ascribing her statements to Jews.

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Goldberg’s Johnson’s latest proclamation that Jewish people wish she kept to herself surrounds Mel Gibson and the taped phone calls Mel made to his girlfriend, where he spewed racial epithets such as “if you get raped by a pack of n***rs it will be your fault.” On this series of recordings, Gibson could also be heard calling Hispanics “wetbacks” and threatening violence against his girlfriend. Keep in mind that this incident comes during a period where Gibson was making a comeback after being shunned for his rabid anti-Semitism.

Whoopi’s reaction [see the video above] to Gibson’s latest is she does not condone what he did but she knows Mel, he has been over her house and she does not think Mel Gibson is a racist or an anti-Semite.

Not a racist? What the heck is she talking about? The man used the “N” word more times in one phone call than most people use in their entire lives. What does he have to do for her to call him a racist, break into Wal-Mart in the middle of the night to steal all the white sheets and lighter fluid?

As far as the anti-Semitism, remember Ms. Johnson you are not really Jewish, drunk or not, Mel’s statement “F**king Jews…the Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world” was not a declaration of admiration.

If the Mel’s not a racist comment was the first crazy thing Whoopi ever said it could be forgiven, but her track record of brain burps is miles long. For example when John McCain was a guest during the 2008 campaign she asked the Senator if strict constitutionalist judges appointed during a McCain administration would bring back Slavery. Two months later, after being criticized for not reading the constitution, Whoopi said she READ the constitution and she was still worried about a return to slavery. Obviously she skipped the part of the 13th Amendment. Maybe she has triskaidekaphobia (fear of the number 13). How else could she miss that, it was in all the papers-150 YEARS AGO!

Goldberg Johnson also believes that African-Americans’ right to vote has to be renewed every few years:

“Do you know that we are the only people in the United States who have to have their voting rights okayed every couple of years? Did you know that they have to vote on the Voting Rights Bill for black folks? Can we just, can one of you candidates- can we just take care of that so I don’t have to worry every year, my God am I not?”

I thought she said she read the constitution. The 15th amendment to the Constitution prohibits racial discrimination in voting. “The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of race, color, or previous condition of servitude.” Constitutional amendments do not expire, nor do they have to be renewed, and there is no fear of the number 15.

Goldberg/Johnson makes really asinine statements and because of her stage name, they are blaming her comments on the Jewish people.

Come on Whoopi, why pick on the poor Jews? Try one of these names on for size:

• Whoopi Rochmanyanoff
• Whoopi Chin
• Whoopi Singh
• Whoopi McSchtuppie
• Whoopi Obama?

Hey I got an Idea! Why not go for the “peace angle” Why don’t you change your name to Whoopi Ahmadinejad? It fits nicely; Ahmadinejad knows nothing about the US constitution either. And it would be helping the President reach out to the Iranian tyrant. What do you say? Try it! Or try anything else.

Please Whoopi, we know the Jews are supposed to be the “chosen people,” but how about choosing someone else for a change. We already have our share of famous embarrassments. Do you know how hard it is every Father’s Day to see Woody Allen walk around with his wife/daughter? We have to take the blame for people like Courtney Love, Rosanne Barr, Al Franken and half of Geraldo Rivera. For heaven’s sake do you know how hard it is to figure out which part of Geraldo is the front side and which is the backside? Come on Ms Johnson, get rid of the Goldberg!! Haven’t the Jews suffered enough?