On Teabagging and Other Oral Servitudes

This past April 15, as a half-million Tea Partiers hit the streets of America to protest the insane tax-and-spend policies of the Obama administration, a new epithet entered the American lexicon, and it was a beauty: “teabagger.” It was both an epithet and a double entendre you just couldn’t top, given the tea bag’s symbolism of the old Boston Tea Party and the anti-tax movement of today. In one fell swoop, a passionate movement was reduced to a perversion of passion: the dunking of one person’s scrotum into another person’s mouth. They got us. Big Time. And it’s everywhere now. Can’t get away from it. Even ABC’s George Stephanopoulos is using it now.

Credit where credit is due, and let’s face it. We Americans, right, left or center, take a churlish pride in a good slam dunk epithet. Not the hardcore racial third rail stuff, mind you. Just the playful sort. You know. Moonbat. Libtard. Tinfoil hat. In fact, tinfoil hat kind of backfired on Righties. Originally used to denigrate Lefties who adhered to psychotic conspiracy theories like 9/11 Truth, the term was embraced in full by the far Left as demonstrated by Markos Moulitsas’ Tinfoil Hat KOS conventions, smashing successes which attracted major left-leaning LibDem politicians over the past few years.

So Lefties revel in their psychoses. What else is new? Yet I seriously doubt teabagger is an epithet conservative Republicans will embrace. Who would? But then it occurred to me. Who’s doing the real oral servicing here? We Tea Partiers, who object tooth and nail to every major scam and power grab liberal Democrats and the President are trying to shove down our throats? Or liberal left-wing mouthpieces who can’t open wide and fast enough for Obama’s Chocolate Munchkin Donut Drop?

Let’s face it. When the White House emails you on the air to correct you, there’s some serious dunking going on there. Funny. Rachel Maddow and Keith Olbermann, who foisted that term in full measure on the public consciousness in mid-April, spent two and a half hours in secret with the President and some other major Obama microphones a few days ago. From what little we hear, the President spent some time railing against FOX News and Glenn Beck, but lips have been sealed very tight around the rest of what went on there. Could it be it was “time to take the dough nuts“?

Personally, I wouldn’t want that getting out either. But I think there was some hardcore slam-dunking going on there, and I’m not talking LeBron James. Whatever is was, I’m sure it would all give Chris Matthews a tickle up his nose. Ironic how the President injected himself orally into this debate, given the circumstances:

“You Democrats, y’all be dunkin’ for yourselves. Those Republicans, they just dunk what they’re told!” Oh really? Like Republicans are just opening wide for Dede Scozzafava? Arlen Specter? Lindsey Graham? John McCain? LOL! Ya, as if. Last I checked, there was a full-fledged rebellion going on in the GOP regarding who dunks who. Conversely, the new mouthpieces over at the NEA can’t seem to service the President fast enough:

“We have received a call from a house that is vanilla to dunk some donuts that are chocolate. Let’s get those lips and brushes moving, people!”

Speaking of servicing, from EIF we have a list of “organically” inspired shows. Need more be said? So the next time some lefty libtard moonbat tinfoil hat Obama mouthpiece like Janeane Garofalo, Rachel Maddow, Keith Olbermann, Anderson Cooper or even George Stephanopoulos talks about teabaggers, just keep in mind whose lips are sealed and whose are always wide open, very receptive and ready to form an airtight seal.

When they do, please remind them not to talk with their mouths full. It’s very rude.

Speaking of sealed lips (not to mention wallets), I myself re-registered this week as an Independent after 29 years as a Republican. Never voted Democrat in my life. But I did not leave the Republican Party. The Republican Party left me. I will not lean across the aisle in order to teabag Obama and the Left on the massive frauds of amnesty, climate change, the government takeover of health care, and all the other budget-busting and power-grabbing LibDem Lefty scams that will have us all teabagging the government in abject serfdom for the next thousand years.

I am a free man. I will not be a teabagging mouthpiece for anyone. Unlike some people ;-)