Will 'The Stoning Of Soraya M.' Get An Oscar Nod?

Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in.

Returning once again to the land beneath the Big Hollywood sign for a most important poll question. “The Stoning of Soraya M.” has received powerful rave reviews across the political spectrum. The buzz is hot. From the leftie pundits at HuffPo (who only seem to be discovering the true human rights horrorshow nature of that regime now, most curious) to the Righties at Big Hollywood and elsewhere, SORAYA M. is a must-see movie that will linger with you long after you’ve left the theater.

Strangely enough, Amnesty lnternational’s Elise Auerbach doesn’t like it. Because stonings in Iran are so rare, don’t you know. No suspension of disbelief for Ms. Elsie. I’m sorry, what’s her job again? Oh yeah, Iran Specialist for Amnesty International. Go figure. Personally, I happen to think one stoning is one too many. And it wasn’t the only one, not by a country mile! But that’s just me. I’m not an Iran specialist for AI. Like, say, Ms. Auerbach. Nice work if you can get it, huh, Ms. Elsie?

By the way, did the acronym AI in the context of Ms. Elsie’s employer and thumbs-down review of Soraya M. remind anyone else of Artificial Intelligence? But I digress. To be sure, there are a number of disturbing productions from Thugocracy Studios that have lingered with me for a very long time now. A young woman’s brutal and heart-wrenching Islamic clothing violation arrest I posted last May, which has generated 6000 hits since. The gay executions. The 140 children on Death Row.

The mass hangings. The stonings and executions of a lot more women and young girls than just Soraya M. Here’s a thugocracy twofer, sisters Zoreh and Azar Kabiri, each charged with adultery, already hit with 99 lashes and now awaiting the rock-throwers. Do their husbands want new wives too, like Soraya’s? Who needs a messy divorce when a good clean stoning works just as well? Nice law if you can get it, if you’re a philandering, misogynist God-fearing Islamist, and the fascist women-hating judges give your word as a man twice that of a woman’s in court.

If you want the full bloody extremist Third Reich tour of Iran, here it is. Here’s the regime’s gay-friendly extermination program. Boys In The Band it ain’t. Point being, will SORAYA M. make the AMPAS nominee list next January, even in its now-extended format of ten candidates for Best Picture? Or, will the Academy bury it as a dirty reminder of their collective shame this past March?

First, let us admit that no politics takes place during The Academy’s selection process. FISH HOOK! You people are just too easy. As for me, I’m torn. See, the Academy, particularly the Nine Stooges of Team Oscar, bravely commanded by Academy Prez and Stooge-In-Chief Sid Ganis, may find it embarrassing to rave about a powerful film on a brutal stoning in Iran after producing TEA WITH AHMADINEJAD and praising the regime’s boffo womens rights record, as thugocracy stooge Annette Bening did. Very unfavorable contrast with Soraya M.

Then again, by rallying to the Forces of Good and whitewashing that abysmal affair in now-chaotic Iran, as they’ve already attempted to with their lame website promo The Road To Isfahan (seen the real Road To Isfahan lately? It ain’t no Bob and Bing movie, that’s for goddamn sure!), they can once again proudly don the mantle of human rights champs, the one they so misplaced for their last tea and finger cookies soiree to the gay-slaughtering and women-stoning Islamist butchers of Iran.

So whattaya think, people? Does “The Stoning of Soraya M.” get showered with Oscar praise, and perhaps even Oscar gold, as Academy absolution of their egregious PR sins in Tehran? Or, do the King-Of-Hearts on Wilshire Boulevard put SORAYA M. in the closet, with all the 4000-plus exterminated Iranian gays? You know, the ones they so forgot about to play the roles of Hollywood Diplomats at the Ahmie and Khamie Punking Extravaganza? Or is it just too powerful a film for even the Academy to sweep under the rug as an Inconvenient Truth?

Cast your vote in the Comments section. Assorted woolgathering on the subject will also be welcome. I leave it to you fine folks at Big Hollywood to ward off the trolls. I’ll be too busy working on my Oscar-quality script honoring and paying homage to no less than Oscar himself.

That is not a punchline, either. Truth is stranger than fiction. Started it last year, when I still adored the Academy and all its members beyond measure. So shall it end, in the spirit of that love. I don’t let politics poison my scripts. I guess I now know why they call it La La Land. You really do have to exist in a state of unreality to get anything worthwhile done. Speaking of states of unreality, feel free to cast your own vote here with the Asylum of Motion Picture Airheads and Stooges.

Lastly, the WaPo, and others of the Leftie LibDem persuasion like President Obama, say any help to the people of Iran, or even siding with them, is a bad move. That smells like moral cowardice to me. Such naive and wishy-washy idealists have stood idly by from King George to Adolf Hitler. I personally believe in calling freedom-crushing, blood-drinking, power-grabbing dictators for what they are. To paraphrase Ronald Reagan, Let Iran Be Iran.

Siding with the Iranian people, who are unimaginably oppressed and trying to shake off their Gestapo-like shackles can’t be bad. Besides, should they win this war on ruthless clerical fascism, which has nothing to do with Allah, whose side do you want them remembering YOU being on?

Playing nice never works with the Hitlers of this world. The regime is already blaming us for interfering anyway. Always have. Makes it easy to label people like students and dissenters as Imperialist and Zionist traitors and execute them. Ever read 1984? May as well commit the crime. And it’s not like they’ve been holding Death to America rallies for thirty years to show their affection.

Let’s show some of that love back. I would also add to that love of a free Iran any requests by a future Iranian People’s Resistance, if the bloodshed of innocents mounts to sickening proportions (which it most likely will), to include smuggling arms to them from Afghanistan and Iraq. Let the regime deal with the kind of Islamic-driven insurgency they’ve been fueling in both countries, not to mention Gaza and Lebanon. Sorry, people. I’m siding with the victims here in full measure, not the perpetrators.

I always side with the Resistance against Hitler. I also believe Congress, The White House and the State Department should be made aware of that sentiment as well. Oh, and if you do contact the White House, please have them correct the President in addressing Khamenei. It’s Supreme ASSWIPE. Do we support Hope and Change in Iran? Or do we play nice, so Ahmie can slaughter all the rounded-up protesters with bloodthirsty impunity, then tell us to fuck off as he finishes his shady basement nuclear project, as he’s always done to the UN, the IAEA and every other nation on earth?

As for me, I say DEATH TO THE DICTATOR! FREE IRAN! Good Night and Good Luck, especially to the poor innocent Iranians suffering unimaginably at the hands of Ahmie and Khamie’s Islamist Gestapo goons even as we speak. It’s the Basiji, Hamas and Hezbollah goons that deserve to die. I’ll gladly help with that any way I can. So should we all. Anything less would be uncivilized. Let’s be the Iranian people’s Right Guard, and help eliminate the foul stench of fascism once and for all.

It’s really stinking up the joint, isn’t it? Lastly, I’d like you all to send a shout-out to the stunningly beautiful and incredibly humorous (she thinks I’m funny) Hannah Irani, aka LuvManatee, at her YouTube and Twitter pages. She is an Iranian-American medical student in LA who is spending a lot of her time live-blogging Iran. Tell her a joke to cheer her up, let her know you’re with her and the Iranian people all the way, and ask her how you can help.

I must say, during these tumultuous times, I have truly found out just how incredibly gorgeous Iranian women are. Persian Princesses all. Women that beautiful have to be saved. Just think of the bennies. A lot of hot bennies for you gays, too ;-)

FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION: Here are some protesters in Iran torching the gas lines to a basiji building and blowing it up. It’s at 0:05 on the far right of the screen. Five Islamist Gestapo basiji goons dead, many injured. It’s the feel-good movie of the summer. Just listen to those cheers! Somebody give that cameraman an Oscar, LOL! You know, I generally don’t like bloodshed. But only if it’s the wrong blood being spilled. Other than that, the Iranian Resistance has carte blanche.

FREE IRAN! DEATH TO THE DICTATOR! Worth a second shout-out, yes? See you at the Oscars!