Suzi Parker, Ace Reporter

Something called “Suzi Parker” who writes something called “She The People” at something called “The Washington Post” bagged the scoop of the century earlier today, in a report originally entitled “Sarah Palin’s plan to reach ‘millions of devoutly religious people’ through al-Jazeera“:

The Sarah Palin Story is a cautionary tale about what can happen when politics and celebrity meet.

Fox News and their once-upon-a-time darling Palin recently parted ways after three years. But never fear. Palin has a new media outlet by which to share her commentary.

Late last week Al Jazeera America announced the former vice-presidential candidate would be joining their news network. Al Jazeera America recently bought Al Gore’s failing Current Media that broadcasts the Current TV channel. Ironically, Fox News recently called Al Jazeera “an anti-American terror mouthpiece.”

“As you all know, I’m not a big fan of newspapers, journalists, news anchors and the liberal media in general,” Palin told the Web site The Daily Currant. “But I met with the folks at Al-Jazeera and they told me they reach millions of devoutly religious people who don’t watch CBS or CNN. That tells me they don’t have a liberal bias.”

Whowhutwhenwhywhere HUH? LOLZ! Man, I guess there just is no end to the stupidity and gullibility of that snowbilly Caribou Barbie, and… oh. Um. Wait. I guess Suzi’s Pulitzer is on hold for the moment, since the story came from a third-rate satire site. So the Post has now updated the scoop with a new title: “Sarah Palin Tries to Stay Relevant“, with a new lede:

CORRECTION: An earlier version of this post incorrectly reported that Sarah Palin planned to contribute to the Al Jazeera America news network.

Maybe a more accurate correction would have added “because we are psychologically incapable of disbelieving about any story the voices in our head tell us about Sarah Palin.” 

Another proud moment for the Washington Post’s layers and layers of fact-checkers. Take a bow, Suzi! And a 500mg of Xanax.